GainesvilleMoms.com

I wan in Target this afternoon and my grand-daughter was looking at the video games, There was a family there also looking at the games and I couldn't help but over-hear the Father talking to his son about using a gift card.
Here is the conversation that took place just while I was standing there.

The boy wanted to spend his gift card on a game. Okay sounds fine to me...after all it is his gift card.
His Father told him he was stupid for spending his whole gift card on one thing.
I couldn't believe my ears....a father telling his son he was stupid.
I walked away and later saw the same family in the toy area and he made another rude comment but i can't say that on here So I am sure this is a on-going event in this family.

I just wondered how many other people hear this kind of degrading comments to young children from their parents and what you think of it.

I would never dream of telling my child he or she was stupid.

It was all I could do not to tell the father what I thought of him, and the Mother was standing right there and said nothing.

This is not the first time I have heard a parent talk to a child this way.

I hate that you had to hear that. I know that if I had heard it, the thought of that conversation would haunt me. I have never heard anyone tell their child they are stupid. What that father is doing, assuming he was the father, is emotional and mental abuse. It is as harmful, in some cases more, than physical abuse. The father should receive extensive counseling. He was probably abused as a child as well. What a shame! I wonder if I would have said something to him? Probably not, I may have shot him some seriously evil looks though. I pray for that poor boy. What a spineless mother too!

How terrible. I have been out places and heard parents belittling or verbally abusing their children too and I too find it really hard to hold my tongue. I also can't stand it when I see a child dirty or a child that looks sad in their eyes...you all know what I mean..

I went into a Wal-Mart one time and had entered through the lawn and garden doors to find a mom holding a two year old that had fallen out of the buggy from standing up in the top seat part. She had hit her head on the concrete floor and was going in and out of consciousness!! The Wal-Mart cashier and the mom were with her the mom was on her cell phone discussing with someone if she should call an ambulance or drive her to the hospital. This young girl had a mark on her head about half the size of a BASEBALL and was losing CONSCIOUSNESS!! HELLO ????? The mom was upset because she had not enough gas and no money on her ,(from what I could catch of the one side of her phone conversation). So I asked the cashier if they had called 911 and the cashier said they were still deciding...Needless to say I called 911. The mom then hung up and told me she hadn't decided if she was going to drive her or go by ambulance yet...meanwhile the little girl is passing out on her moms shoulder and her mom keeps shaking her to wake her up..(OMGosh!) The mom said she had no money to pay for an ambulance and no cash and didn't want to be stuck in Gainesville with no cash so she was having a friend meet her at Wal-mart to drive them to the ER..I told her that her daughter might not live if she waited the 45 minutes minimum it takes to drive to Gainesville and she needed to be in an ambulance so they could help her..then I gave her 20 bucks and made sure they took the ambulance.

I don't know how some of these poor kids survive with parents that don't have common sense or parenting skills....

This is obviously a sore spot with me...

Karen

Wow these stories are unbelievably sad! I just don't understand how a parent can talk to their child like that or how a parent cannot always put there child first no matter what the cost (in the case of the ambulance). If your child is hurt, you do WHATEVER it takes. No question about it.

Whenever I hear a parent talking to their child in appropriately I always kind of just shoot them a look like, I can hear you, and I think what you are saying is wrong.

But I think the saddest part is if parents are willing to talk like that in public, what are they willing to do behind closed doors?

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But I think the saddest part is if parents are willing to talk like that in public, what are they willing to do behind closed doors?

I totally agree with you Stacy. I think most of us will agree that we've held back a bit with our kids or SO in public, so I can't imagine if these people are also holding back! Scary and sad

I agree that these are fodder for the "what not to do when parenting" book. But on the flip side, have you ever seen a family that was just letting their kid run out of control and yell and just plain misbehave and not do anything about it? That irritates me too.

I'd like to think that most times when I see a parent yelling or snapping at a child in public that it's just a moment of stress and that kind of reaction isn't the norm ... but I think that might be a little naive.

I have given my fair share of dirty looks, but I have never gotten up the courage to actually say anything -- although there are times when I really wanted to. If I ever saw a parent physically handle a child or felt like a child was in danger, I sure as hell would do something or call somebody (like the police).

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Originally posted by klmorg:
How terrible. I have been out places and heard parents belittling or verbally abusing their children too and I too find it really hard to hold my tongue. I also can't stand it when I see a child dirty or a child that looks sad in their eyes...you all know what I mean..

I went into a Wal-Mart one time and had entered through the lawn and garden doors to find a mom holding a two year old that had fallen out of the buggy from standing up in the top seat part. She had hit her head on the concrete floor and was going in and out of consciousness!! The Wal-Mart cashier and the mom were with her the mom was on her cell phone discussing with someone if she should call an ambulance or drive her to the hospital. This young girl had a mark on her head about half the size of a BASEBALL and was losing CONSCIOUSNESS!! HELLO ????? The mom was upset because she had not enough gas and no money on her ,(from what I could catch of the one side of her phone conversation). So I asked the cashier if they had called 911 and the cashier said they were still deciding...Needless to say I called 911. The mom then hung up and told me she hadn't decided if she was going to drive her or go by ambulance yet...meanwhile the little girl is passing out on her moms shoulder and her mom keeps shaking her to wake her up..(OMGosh!) The mom said she had no money to pay for an ambulance and no cash and didn't want to be stuck in Gainesville with no cash so she was having a friend meet her at Wal-mart to drive them to the ER..I told her that her daughter might not live if she waited the 45 minutes minimum it takes to drive to Gainesville and she needed to be in an ambulance so they could help her..then I gave her 20 bucks and made sure they took the ambulance.

I don't know how some of these poor kids survive with parents that don't have common sense or parenting skills....

This is obviously a sore spot with me...

Karen

Whats really sad is that she has money to blow at Wal Mart but can't spend money to take care of her seriously injured child!! I don't understand some people's thinking/ rationale. No amount of money would stop me from saving my child's life, ugh, the hospital will bill you and you can give them ten dollars a month if you have too.

ok, now there is nothing in karen's post to lead us to believe that she was "blowing" money at walmart. she may have been there to buy diapers or formula.

some young moms don't understand how serious an injury like that can be. can you for just a second imagine her thoughts at the time? karen did. she helped, gave her a little cash and set a good example. thanks karen, i god placed you in the right spot at the right time.

Did Karen say the mom at Wal-Mart was young? I might have missed that. But either way, I don't think it matters if you are a young mom or an older mom. Any mom can make the wrong choice, act selfishly or be inexperienced when it comes to raising a child. On the flip side, any mom, regardless of age, can choose to do what is best for her child.

Too bad there isn't some Parenting 101 class that all parents have to take!

But like softballmom said, thank goodness there are people like Karen willing to help when a parent is confused and doesn't know what to do.

Let me give some more insite for you all.

The mom at Wal-Mart was probably in her early to mid twenties. Also...as softball mom said there is no telling what she was at Wal-Mart to buy. The main problem I had was that she didn't secure her child in the first place by allowing her to stand in the top seat,(I don't even allow my three year old to stand in the bottom part),which is why she fell in the first place. She(the mom) was a little short with me in the beginning because I think she felt like I was butting in but I could not just not say or do anything...once she understood I wasn't ridiculing her but actually was concerned for her daughters life she relaxed a little bit. At the end she even said thank you to me. Her priorities were just mixed up...it was like she was 'inconveinenced' by her daughter falling! I was on the phone with 911 until the ambulance got there because the operator knew the child was in serious condition. While on the phone I was telling the mom that the ambulance bill was the last thing she should be worrying about. Then she asked me if I really thought she(the little girl) might be seriously hurt. So I think the mom was a little niave as well about medical issues because when she finally realized how concerned I was she also became concerned. I know I did the same thing you all would have done too...

and as Stacy said wouldn't it be nice if there were mandatory parenting classes that we all had to attend... in an ideal world there would be pay compensation and daycare provided for the course too That would be something worth my tax dollars!!

Karen

I too, have seen similar events of all of these scenarios while out and about.
About the Wal-Mart thing...My daughter had a seizure while I was in Wal-Mart when she was 6 months old. I didn't know it was a siezure until later, but what happened, was she stiffened her body, made bubbling noises out of her mouth-like she couldn-t breath, then passed out on my shoulder). I dropped everything I was holding right there in the aisle, and ran to the front of the store to the service desk to get help. My way of thinking switched when I entered a "mind of emergency", and the people at the desk just looked at me kinda weird (I didn't actually talk to anyone, I just went to the desk, and said out loud "My daughter just had something happen!"). I pulled out my cell phone, and called my mom (who lives about 5 minutes from wal-mart), and told her what happened. She rushed up there, where I was waiting outside, and she took us to the ER. I would have taken her myself, but I was so shaken up about the incident, that I was starting to have an asthma attack and I know we wouldn't have gotten there safely with my driving while in that state of mind.
In the case of the younger mother, she may have been in a "mind of emergency" and not known what to do. I know CPR, but I am afraid that if I'm ever presented a time where I have to use it, I will not know how, because of being in that type of situation. I hope this i making sense...
Also, the daycare I used to work at in Gainesville used to make it mandatory that all parents attend a parenting class every quarter (According to the college semesters, I believe), in order to keep their child enrolled. This, however, got cut as soon as there were budget changes. I agree, though-It should be mandatory for ALL schools-any schools, to require that. The government needs to have a better heads-up on what goes on in certain families. It's so upsetting to see this, and those children will most likely grow up to do that to their children, in a never-ending cycle. Hopefully one day, all parents and children will get the help they need, in order to make the world a better place.